Unleashing Assertive Play

This blog explores how volunteer parent coaches can teach young athletes to play more assertively by building confidence, encouraging effort, and using practical strategies that promote competitive play while maintaining sportsmanship.

4/8/20252 min read

As a volunteer parent coach, you might notice some young athletes hesitate during key moments—pulling back from challenges, avoiding confrontations, or playing it safe. While it's crucial to respect each child's comfort level, fostering assertive play can enhance both individual performance and team dynamics. But how can you encourage this assertiveness without crossing into unsportsmanlike aggression? Let's explore strategies to cultivate a healthy competitive spirit in young athletes.​

Understanding Assertiveness vs. Aggression

First, it's essential to distinguish between assertiveness and aggression:​

  • Assertiveness involves confidently pursuing one's goals while respecting others. It's about taking initiative, being proactive, and playing with determination.​

  • Aggression often disregards the rights or safety of others, leading to hostile or violent behavior.​

Encouraging assertiveness means promoting a mindset where players feel empowered to take action without resorting to harmful tactics.​

The Role of Mindset in Assertive Play

A player's mindset significantly influences their on-field behavior. Fear of failure or making mistakes can lead to passive play. To counter this:​

  • Shift Focus from Fear to Success: Encourage players to concentrate on achieving their goals rather than avoiding mistakes. This positive focus can naturally lead to more assertive actions. ​

  • Set Effort-Based Goals: Emphasize the importance of giving full effort over merely winning. Recognizing effort reinforces the value of hard work and determination.​

  • Normalize Mistakes as Learning Opportunities: Create an environment where errors are seen as part of the learning process, reducing anxiety and promoting risk-taking.​

Practical Strategies to Foster Assertiveness
1. Skill Development

Confidence stems from competence. By enhancing fundamental skills, players feel more equipped to engage assertively.​

Tip: Incorporate drills that simulate game situations, allowing players to practice decision-making under pressure.​

2. Controlled Physicality

Introduce exercises that encourage safe physical engagement. For example, in basketball, drills that focus on securing rebounds amidst opponents can teach players to assert their space responsibly.​

Tip: Use drills that require players to compete for possession, emphasizing proper technique and respect for others. ​

3. Role-Playing Scenarios

Use role-playing to rehearse responses to various in-game situations, helping players prepare mentally and physically for assertive actions.​

Tip: Create scenarios where players must decide between passive and assertive responses, discussing the outcomes of each choice.​

4. Positive Reinforcement

Acknowledge and praise assertive behaviors during practices and games. Positive reinforcement reinforces desired actions and boosts confidence.​

Tip: Implement a reward system for players who demonstrate assertiveness, such as taking initiative or showing resilience.​

Engaging Parents in the Process

Parents play a crucial role in reinforcing assertive behaviors:​

  • Communication: Keep parents informed about the team's focus on developing assertiveness and how they can support this at home.​

  • Modeling Behavior: Encourage parents to model assertive yet respectful behavior in their interactions, as children often emulate adult actions.​

Monitoring Progress and Adjusting Approaches

Regularly assess the effectiveness of your strategies:​

  • Feedback Sessions: Hold brief meetings with players to discuss their feelings about their assertiveness and areas they wish to improve.​

  • Adaptability: Be prepared to adjust coaching methods to suit the evolving needs of the team and individual players.​

Final Thoughts

Instilling assertive play in young athletes is a delicate balance that requires patience, understanding, and strategic approaches. By focusing on skill development, fostering a positive mindset, and engaging both players and parents, volunteer parent coaches can cultivate a team culture that values assertiveness within the bounds of respect and sportsmanship. Remember, the goal is to empower young athletes to confidently pursue their objectives while honoring the integrity of the game and their fellow competitors.