Why the Practice vs. Game Disconnect Happens (From the Kid’s Viewpoint)

Kids often feel dramatically different in a practice environment versus a real game. Practice feels safer: mistakes are expected, the stakes are lower, and there's less judgment. They get repeated reps, predictable conditions, and typically no anxious eyes on them counting every error. In contrast, a game brings variables: scoreboard, spectators, perceived expectations, pressure to perform, fear of failure, and the need to execute under uncertainty. Several sports psychology sources describe how mental factors like fear of judgment, performance anxiety, and overthinking often show up under game conditions, even when the physical skills are there.

It's normal for kids to have strong skills in practice but “freeze” or become overly cautious in a game. They may rehearse the mechanics perfectly during drills, but in the game they hesitate, worry about making mistakes, or try too hard (which often backfires). According to “When Kids Play Better in Practice Than Games,” fear of failure, fear of judgment, and a reluctance to trust the skills they learned in practice are among the top reasons this happens.

Key Mental & Emotional Barriers

Here are some of the mental/emotional hurdles that tend to show up:

• Performance anxiety: This includes worrying about what others think, fear of letting the team down, or being judged harshly. When anxiety is high, attention can wander or shift to concerns (Will I make a mistake? What will they say?). This can interfere with decision‐making and execution.

• Overthinking vs. “playing in the moment”: Practice often allows repetition and a relaxed pace. In games, because things happen fast, thinking too much about mechanics can slow or misroute reactions. When athletes try to consciously force perfection (e.g. “keep my elbow high,” “follow through just so”), performance often suffers.

• Fear of mistakes & perfectionism: Kids who perform well in practice may still have internal narratives like “I must do everything right in the game” which adds pressure. Mistakes that in practice are forgiven become magnified in games. This can lead to playing safe, avoiding risk, or shrinking their style.

• Mental toughness is different under real pressure: It takes experience, mindset training, and deliberate exposure to stressors for kids to build the psychological “muscle” to handle game‐time pressure.

What Coaches & Parents Can Do to Help the Translation

Knowing the issue is half the battle. Here are actionable strategies to help young athletes perform more like themselves in games.

1. Simulate Game Pressure in Practice

Introduce drills that mimic the pressure, pace, or stakes of a game. Examples: timed drills, small‐sided scrimmages, situations where mistakes have a visible cost (e.g. “if you miss this pass, you sit out,” or “defense scores if offense messes up”). These help kids become used to decision‐making under pressure and reduce the shock when real games arrive.

2. Normalize Mistakes & Frame Them as Learning

Make conversations about errors part of team culture. After games or scrimmages, instead of just pointing out what went wrong, ask: What did you try? What worked? What felt hard? What will you try differently next time? Praise effort even when the outcome wasn't perfect. Use stories or examples of pro athletes who keep going despite errors.

3. Mental Skills Training

Teach tools like visualization (picturing success under game conditions), breathing techniques (deep breath, counting), cues for self‐talk (“Focus on the play, not the mistakes”), or routines that calm nerves before games. Even short mental rehearsal can help bridge the gap between practice comfort and game stress.

4. Reinforce Confidence in Skill & Preparation

Remind the athlete often that their performance in practice is valid evidence of capability. One idea: have them write down things they do well in practice. Before a game, review that list to boost confidence. Remind them that skills don’t disappear—they get more difficult to access under pressure, but with mental support, they can access them.

5. Manage Expectations & Reduce External Pressure

Often the pressure kids feel is internal (wanting to prove themselves), but external expectations (coaches, parents, teammates) amplify it. Be mindful of how you talk about games, results, and performance. Encourage process over results (“How did you move? Did you give effort?” rather than “How many goals?”). Parents and coaches can both help here by modeling calmness, emphasizing growth, and avoiding over‐criticism of mistakes.

6. Build Familiarity and Routine Around Game Days

Predictable pre‐game routines (warm‐ups, stretches, designated time for mental prep) reduce cognitive load and anxiety. Knowing what to expect helps kids focus on performance rather than worrying about the “unknowns.” Also, ensure practice sessions include both drills and game‐like play so kids aren’t caught off‐guard by speed or chaos in real games.

What Research Suggests & Why This Matters Long Term

If this gap between practice and game isn’t addressed, it can lead to several issues: decreasing confidence, frustration, discouragement, and eventually attrition (kids quitting sports). According to the TrueSport organization, performance anxiety is higher than ever in youth sports because of increased pressure from parents, coaches, social media, and metrics, and this anxiety often causes performance to dip when it counts.

Also, mental toughness and consistent performance under pressure don’t just improve sports outcomes—they transfer to life skills: resilience, discipline, handling nervousness in other settings (like school, public speaking), emotional regulation.

Putting It All Together: A Coach/Parent Action Plan

1. Watch & Ask: Observe what changes from practice to game (body language, timing, hesitation). Ask the athlete how they feel differently.

2. Design Practice with Pressure Elements: Use game‐speed drills, scrimmages, crowd noise or distractions, or even friendly “punishments” that mimic stakes.

3. Mindset Prep Before Games: Short pep talks that focus on doing your best, trusting your training, and knowing mistakes are okay. Consider a ritual or mantra kids can use to reset mentally.

4. Follow Up After Games with Reflection: Debrief with the athlete—what went well, what felt hard, what felt different than practice. Normalize challenges.

5. Encourage Supportive Feedback from Parents: Parents can help by noticing small progress, cheering effort, avoiding comparisons, and modeling calmness.

Final Thoughts: Bridging the Practice/Game Gap Isn’t Instant—but It’s Doable

Seeing your child or player shine in practice but struggle in games is frustrating. But it’s also normal. The mental side of sport is huge, especially for youth athletes, and it’s one that develops over time. With patient, consistent support, athletes learn to carry their best practice selves into game moments.